After You

And I wish you well
With your ambivalence
Not my cup of tea
This tepid disconnect
Shrouded in gaiety
Dipped in poison ink
Frequently hollow
But you left a stain
On my semi-conscious soul
Devoid of constraints
Vulnerable as sin
Now black like sludge
This transformation
Of before and after you
The pictures tell a lie
All the sincere smiles
I honestly felt loved
Until the ground gave way
And spit you back ashore
Like a beached whale
Bloated with self-confidence
Aching to be free of me
So I wish you well
It’s the platitude of lips
As they tremble and twist
The lies I tell myself
So that I may still exist
Without the smell of you
This fire extinguished
That only you could stoke
Back when you still cared
Or some part of me believed
Yet that was some other time
And I was some other me
But now it’s after you
And I’m simply numb.

Sam

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