Two For Tuesday

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” ~William Arthur Ward

When I first got married Christmas was all about watching my wife’s face when she opened the presents I gave her, and it wasn’t just about her getting to see my carefully chosen gifts. It was just as much about whether or not she’d even be able to open them because I’m horrible at wrapping presents, so I put a ton of tape on each one to hold them together. Watching her face while she tugged at that tape was part amusing, part embarrassing, but eventually she would get through and her eyes would light up at the presents contained within.

Then she would thank me profusely for each gift, because it was never just about the gifts but about the thought that went into each one. Imagine if I had given her the gifts and she had said nothing, just put them away and let them collect dust. I would have been devastated because I wouldn’t know if she liked them or not, and I would feel like my time had been wasted in choosing each one with love. I think that would have to be one of the worst feelings ever.

For me, not saying thank you, not expressing my gratitude when others do things I appreciate, would make them feel exactly the same — awful. They don’t do things for me because they expect something in return, but it’s being considerate of their feelings to say how grateful I am. And now, every Tuesday, I am celebrating being grateful, and saying it out loud, listing two things I appreciate that week. Now, without any further ado, here’s my Two this Tuesday…

1. I’m grateful for therapy. Throughout the course of my life I’ve had the occasion to visit three different therapists, and we’ve had a range of discussions on pretty much every difficult topic in my life in the past and at those specific times. It usually took some pretty hefty issues to make me go, but once I’ve gotten “on the couch” it’s been very helpful every single time. What I love most about therapy is that none of my therapists have been like the ones on TV or in the movies. They don’t constantly ask me how things make me feel. It’s just in the course of the conversation that I get out those feelings naturally, organically, without feeling pressured or prodded into telling all.

2. I’m grateful for a wife who can cook and bake. I’ll readily admit that I’m not the best when it comes to kitchen skills, and that’s not for lack of trying. I’ve been around the world and back again with learning the step by step process to make many dishes, but unless I have a ready made box generally it doesn’t come out well. I could tell you about the time I left the plastic on the lasagna when it went into the oven, or the time I burned the casserole because I forgot to set the timer, or the time I didn’t put sugar in the muffin mix, not that anyone’s keeping track or anything. But thank god I married a woman who is a wiz in the kitchen, even if she doesn’t think so. She can cook up just about anything, and her baked goods are to die for!

Sam