I love it when I see movies and TV shows where the characters either are young or they get all nostalgic about their youth and they mention games they played at parties. These games consisted of ways to get, uh, close and personal, with the opposite sex. I often wonder who was fooling whom, or who thought the games were little innocent games, but I have to think at least the guys knew what was happening. But I would have to take everyone’s word for it because I never played any of those games.
The Games
Twister – This one looks hilarious on the box, with someone’s leg over someone else’s arm, a twisted torso here, an elbow swinging out wide there. What the game does is gets people close enough to kiss if they were so inclined, the physical proximity possibly dizzying for the kid who never got in too much close contact with the opposite sex.
Spin the Bottle – Obvious much? The whole object of the game is to spin this bottle, and whomever it lands on you have to kiss him/her. Of course it’s fun when yours lands on the girl of your dreams (of course why she was invited to the same party as you were is beyond me), and you get a quick peck on the lips (if you don’t pass out first), but it’s quite awkward when it lands on the grimy dude you know never brushes his teeth (or showers, for that matter).
Seven Minutes in Heaven – Getting locked in a closet with a member of the opposite sex for seven minutes (they’re timing you) could be an amazing encounter, or it could be the most embarrassing thing ever. Or it could be both at the same time. Be sure you don’t pass out, though, because you’ll miss all the fun, AND you’ll be the object of ridicule when the closet is open and you’re passed out all over the mop. You know, not that it ever happened to me or anything.
Truth or Dare – I think sometimes it’s called Truth or Consequences, but I have no frame of reference for that except the movies and TV shows that I’ve seen it in. I think it’s all about choosing which one you’ll do, the truth or the dare, and when you choose truth your “friends” find all sorts of ways to embarrass you. The dare is worse, though, because then you have to do things that are by their very nature embarrassing. Yeah, this game is all about embarrassing you, and usually the older the kids playing it, the more sexual the dares become. Eek.
I Never – The premise of this game is to say “I never…” and whomever of the group also never did whatever you said just sit tight. If, however, they HAVE partaken of whatever sinful thing you’ve also done, they have to drink up. Ooh, the classic drinking game. I like it already. I’m sure there are other variations of it where people have to do embarrassing things (like drinking isn’t embarrassing enough). You do find out very intimate things about others, though, through the course of this game, and often people who have played I Never in a particular group who have revealed too much end up dropping out of that group. So sad.
The Reality
I never played any of those “party” games because I grew up in a very strict household that discouraged such blatant disregard for social and sexual boundaries. And boy did I ever feel left out! I would see movies like The Breakfast Club and I would want to be on Saturday detention. I would see parties like the ones depicted in other ’80s movies and I would yearn for just a moment doing “typical” things like the kids in those films did. And the TV shows were probably worse because they showed these things more often, like blatant disregard for parental rules, with the kids having parties while their parents were away (like, who would leave their pre-teen kids alone in a house overnight?) and doing obscene things (or at least obscene to my virginal mind).
The Verdict
Funny, then, how I began having conversations with “normal” people who had grown up going to just those types of parties, and playing just those types of games, and by and large they said it was nothing to be jealous over. In fact, several of the “normal” folks laughed at me for being all worked up over it. They all informed me that the games were just ways to pass the time, and to get out some of that sexual tension that they always seemed to have after the age of 11 (and for some of them, even before the age of 11 – god have mercy on their souls). The only game they admit did any lasting damage to them and their friendships was I Never, and only because that was usually a late high-school, early-college game, and when you get to be that age those things stick with you, and they aren’t as “innocent.”
I always felt like I was missing out, but now that I think about it, and after talking with others, I think it’s okay that I wasn’t involved in those rites of passage. It colors how I see those movies and TV shows, though, but maybe that’s not so bad. I can see them as just funny and awkward, without having the memories to go along with it. And that’s just okay with me. As long as you’ll agree to play I Never with me sometime. That one still sounds fun.
Sam
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