Caught in the Middle

“Reckless abandon wrapped in common sense. Deep water faith in the shallow end, and we are caught in the middle” ~Casting Crowns

I stood on the edge of a future fraught with possible landmines, I had no idea if I even wanted to jump, and who would have blamed me for standing still? Believe me, I was the last person to know what I wanted in that moment, in the pause that seemed to stretch into forever with how long I waited it out.

Looking back, I was hoping a decision would be made for me, that things would be packaged up and all I would have to do is put the bow on it. But that’s not how life happens, not often enough anyway. What life does is it waits until we’ve finally made the decision, then it changes our plans, whether we like it or not.

So what was I waiting for?

You could say I was always the one to look before leaping anyway, that I would generally weigh all possible options before wading in, or I wouldn’t wade in at all. I can’t tell you how many opportunities passed me by while I was sitting there waiting to make a decision (or 20).

I’m not sure if it was being careful, meticulous, or just indecisive, but it seemed to work relatively well for me. Continue reading “Caught in the Middle”

This Is Acting

Life is a series of actions and reactions, the interactions between us and others, between us and our surroundings, and between us and our own minds. We wrestle with decisions every day, fighting against thoughts that could tend to derail us. We have expectations that we strive to achieve, provided we actually believe they are … Continue reading This Is Acting

Decision Point #2

I always second guess my decisions. It doesn’t matter how simple they are, or how stress free they should be, or would be for others, I somehow find myself grappling with them long after the outcome is already set in stone. There’s just something about the alternatives that are fascinating to me, the idea that … Continue reading Decision Point #2


“You look lost.” “I do?” “Where you headed?” “Well, I was just about to figure that out.” I remember in that movie Cast Away, at the end when Tom Hanks’ character should be happy because he has escaped the island, but he’s not because the woman of his dreams has made her choice, and he … Continue reading Crossroads

Married to Fate

“We make our own fortunes and we call them fate.” ~Benjamin Disraeli How is it that opportunities seem to happen more when we least expect them? I’ve noticed that when we finally give up on something is usually when it happens for us, and sometimes it’s too late to truly change anything, but on occasion … Continue reading Married to Fate