I try my hardest not to think about my time working on a farm. You can understand how me, a city boy, blanches every time a farm animal is mentioned, right? But my children are different, and I think they get it from their mother (who is a bona fide country girl through and through). They walk around here barefoot, they like Travis Tritt, and they like all things farm-related. Of course sometimes they might like things they don’t really know too much about.
Hmmmm. As always, Lexi and I have a lot of our most compelling conversations when it’s my bath night, and tonight was no exception.
Me: What did you do today?
Lexi: I had fun with the animals.
Me: What animals?
Lexi: Um, there were goats, and a llama. And my cow.
Me: You have a cow?
Lexi: Yeah, I have a cow. He puts out the fertilizer.
Me: Your cow is a boy?
Lexi: No, silly. He’s a girl.
Me: Uh, okay. How does she put out the fertilizer?
Lexi: You know.
Me: I do, but I’m not sure you do.
Lexi: Of course I do. It comes from his milk.
Me: His milk?
Lexi: Yeah, but first you have to get the milk out of him.
Me: That sounds like it would be hard.
Lexi: No, it just takes a stool. Really easy.
Me: And then what?
Lexi: Well, you mix salt with his milk.
Lexi: Whoever is there.
Me: Does the cow mix the salt in?
Lexi: No, of course not silly! That’s funny. The cow mixes the salt in himself.
Me: Then what?
Lexi: Then we spread it near my tree to help it grow.
Me: Wait. You have a cow AND a tree?
Lexi: My tree is really small right now, but it’s going to get big later.
Me: Is your cow small too?
Lexi: No, silly! It’s the size of your car.
Me: But my car can’t mix salt with its milk.
Lexi: [laughing] That would be funny if it could.
Me: What’s your cow’s name?
Me: How original.
Me: You ever have goat cheese?
Lexi: [laughing] Silly, goats can’t make cheese.
Me: And cows can?
Lexi: No. Cheese comes from the store.
Me: Yes. Yes it does.