Chatting With Lexi: On Being Wrong

to-be-creative-lose-the-fear-of-being-wrong-quote-1Okay, so she gets it honest. Lexi absolutely hates being wrong, at any time, in any way. In fact, she will try her best to convince you after the fact that she’s still right regardless of the evidence against that even remotely being true. She reminds me of myself when she gets obstinate like that, crafting entire scenarios to bolster her version of events, creating entirely new scientific evidence from thin air to support her claim. But in the end she’s not even really convincing herself, just really trying to distance herself from what she perceives as failure.

We’ve talked about it often, this inability to accept the truth when it skews differently from her opinion, and it bothers me because I see her growing up as this inflexible human being, like I still am at times. I guess it’s true that we want something more for our children than we’ve had, and in this case I don’t want her to have this portion of herself be like me. I want her to be open to the glory of being wrong. The following conversation happened while we were reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.

Me: So, Lexi, why do you think Harry is worried about this potion that Snape just gave to Professor Lupin?

Lexi: I don’t know.

Me: Well, think about it. Harry thinks Snape is evil, AND he knows that Snape wants Lupin’s job. Why would that worry him, Snape giving Lupin the potion?

Lexi: I don’t know what you want me to say!

Me: I don’t want you saying something just because. I want you to use some of your own reasoning skills and arrive at an educated guess.

Lexi: But I don’t know.

Me: Well, how do you think Snape could get Lupin’s job? And how might a potion have anything to do with that plan?

Lexi: Maybe the potion could give Snape Lupin’s job.

Me: How?

Lexi: Daaaaaad. I don’t want to guess anymore. Continue reading “Chatting With Lexi: On Being Wrong”

Chatting With Lexi: On Fears

we-all-fear-the-unknownFor a child who is remarkably self-assured it’s curious that Lexi also has a plethora of fears, ranging far and wide (and even into some territory where I just scratch my head and wonder “Huh?”) for better or for worse. Of course, though, she has no fear of strangers, and will indeed tell them her life story if given a chance in the line at Wal-Mart. She also isn’t afraid of failure, even though in many ways she’s a perfectionist. But the things she fears she REALLY fears. It’s like she freezes solid when the subjects even come up.

And it’s at those moments that she reminds me of… me.

Me: Lexi, I need you to go upstairs to put away the toys you got out.

Lexi: But Dad, I CAN’T GO UP THERE.

Me: Why not? It’s just for a minute to put those toys away.

Lexi: But I’m SCARED.

Me: There’s nothing to be scared of. Your mother and I are right down here.

Lexi: But I’m still SCARED. I don’t want to go up there.

Me: Well, you got out the toys, so you need to put them away. You’re going to have to go up there anyway.

Lexi: I can’t do it. I JUST CAN’T.

Me: What are you afraid of, though? Why are you so scared to go up there by yourself?

Lexi: Because she’s up there.

Me: Who?

Lexi: The gh-gh-ghost.

Me: Oh my. Lexi, ghosts aren’t real.

Lexi: You don’t know that!

Me: Uh, yeah, I know that. Ghosts aren’t real. And even if they were they can’t hurt you.

Lexi: That’s not what they say on Teen Titans. Continue reading “Chatting With Lexi: On Fears”