Author: Sam McManus

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Idolatry

american-idolIt is early morning, and there are 3,500 people packed into a giant room, all waiting to be called so they can show their stuff. Every single one of the other 3,499 people who sit there are poseurs though, because you — you are the next American Idol, and you almost feel sorry for those whose dreams will be crushed on this day. Then your number is called. You are supremely confident as you strut — yes, strut — into the room where the judges currently sit, waiting to tell you what you’ve known since you were young. They listen attentively — for 30 seconds before a hand is raised into the air. Your verdict comes.

Damn them, you think as you leave the room with their “No”s still ringing in your ears. It is late afternoon and your entire life has been invalidated. By that one simple word, multiplied by the power of three. That one word made you doubt every single loved one who told you how amazing your voice sounded in the shower every morning, every friend who went with you to karaoke and exclaimed how good you were, and every stranger who heard you singing at work and said, “Right on.” All of your faith in yourself, gone in the blink of an eye.

That’s because you tied all of your belief system up to one pie-in-the-sky idea, to an occupation that is hit-or-miss at best, one that spits out even some of the best voices and makes gruel of them. And honestly, you’re no Adam Lambert. So, why did all those people say you were the best they’d ever heard? BECAUSE IT COST THEM ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO SAY IT. See, they would have done you a better service had they been like my mother and told the truth. At least then you wouldn’t be sitting there on the curb outside of the American Airlines Arena looking like your dog just died, and questioning everything you ever thought you knew. Continue reading “Idolatry”

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Checked Out: Week 7

A rich white man commits suicide and leaves the vast majority of his fortune to his black housekeeper. In the 1980s. In the deep south. When the news hits, the gossip is a mile wide, and the lawyers come out of the woodwork to contest the will. And to add fuel to the fire, the … Continue reading Checked Out: Week 7

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Sunday Shuffle

videos-musicales-de-los-90-nirvana-smells-like-teen-spiritMusic has always been my first love, so it’s always almost therapeutic for me to listen to songs that resonate, or that bring me back to an early time in my life, when I first discovered music. During my series of “Shuffles” I’ve been getting back to listening to songs in a random order on my iPod, and it’s been an interesting journey to say the least. So, here is the latest, my Sunday Shuffle…

1. Lucky Town – Darren Hayes

Darren Hayes was the voice of Savage Garden, that 90s group that gave us such anthems as “I Want You,” “I Knew I Loved You,” and “Truly Madly Deeply.” I miss that group, actually, but Hayes’ voice holds up very well in his solo career as well. This song is one of the special ones.

2. Get Down Like That – Ne-Yo
3. B*%ch Please – Snoop Dogg (feat. Xzibit)

I always love it when Snoop Dogg shows up on a shuffle because I know I’m always guaranteed some good  beats when it comes to the big Dogg.

4. On the Coast of Somewhere Beautiful (Live) – Kenny Chesney

This one was the first time Kenny Chesney ever played this song live, so it’s an amazing performance, a once-in-a-lifetime deal. I’ve always liked this song from the album, too, so I was glad it came on. It was good to groove to while I was writing my previous blog entry.

5. Stand Up Comedy – U2

Listening to this song, from the most recent U2 album, just makes me hungry for the new album, which I think will be coming sometime in the summer, hopefully. Getting to hear the new songs “Ordinary Love” and “Invisible” just make me excited as well. Continue reading “Sunday Shuffle”

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Closing Time

ktflkda-l_i_get_awesome“So gather up your jackets, move it to the exits. I hope you have found a friend. Closing time. Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” -Semisonic

You know how it is at the end of the night (or the early morning in some cases), when you’re so tired you can barely hold your eyes open, but you know you have to somehow make it home, so you do. You don’t remember how you got home, but you woke up in the late morning hour with a hangover and a dreadfully hazy recollection of the night before. Perhaps you even have a text sitting on your phone from someone you don’t know, or at least not that you remember anyway, and their words hint at the two of you being best friends. You scratch your head and chalk it all up to the drinking, telling yourself you won’t get that drunk again.

But it’s a vicious cycle: the partying, the staying up until all hours, the random people you co-opt into being your “friends” for the night, and always the alcohol permeating everything else. I should know. I used to live that lifestyle. It was called my late teens. For some people it’s their entire twenties. For others it’s still going on now, and for those people I have a wealth of sympathy. It can be enticing, to get that buzz, to lose your inhibitions and do things you wouldn’t do sober, but it has its consequences. Believe me. Why do you think AA is so pervasive in our society? People want to stop, but it’s so difficult.

I’ll tell you a story. It was one night just like many others during that time period for me, when we had gone out drinking, then stumbled to somebody’s house (not sure who lived there, actually, even to this day), and the drinking picked up again. There was beer, and wine coolers, and hard liquor, and grain alcohol, and pretty much anything else you could think of. Sometime along the way I had gotten that pleasant, warm feeling that made me feel invincible. I called it my Superman buzz. It made me the life of the party. Continue reading “Closing Time”

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Six For Saturday

It’s amazing to me how much happens during the course of a normal week, and you know my brain goes about a mile a minute. So I thought at the end of each week I would sum up the top six recurring thoughts in my head, or just ideas or stories that hit me in … Continue reading Six For Saturday