Dear Journal: Male Order

Dear Journal,

I was just thinking today about how the vast majority of my friends are female. That’s for many reasons, but I guess the biggest one is that women have many interests. They aren’t just limited to sports talk, sex talk, and car talk. Don’t get me wrong. I know not all guys are stuck on those three subjects either, but it’s so tedious to get past the banal chitchat to focus on something other than them that I feel more often than not that it’s not worth it.

Women will start off a conversation with, “So what have you read lately?” instead of “Check out the rack on that chick.” They’ll begin with, “What’s going on with you?” rather than “My carburetor is leaking oil again!” They’re more other-centered right off the bat instead of focused on themselves, and it’s always refreshing for me to have a conversation with the fairer sex for those reasons and more.

So why do I want to find some guy friends? It’s simple. I can’t just go places with my female friends. Public perception is a fickle thing, and a married guy hanging out with females who aren’t his wife — ooh boy. I’d like to think that we’ve evolved to a point where it wouldn’t be talked about, because they’re always just friends, but that’s not where we are. I’m supposed to have guy friends, so I’m going to go out and try to make some. For society’s sake.

That doesn’t mean I won’t still have my female friends. I need them for their level heads, for their witty banter, and for their genuine friendship. I’ve never really understood why so many guys say that women are high strung. They seem even keel to me. Sure, they’re emotional, but so are guys, except guys hide their emotions while women let them have free reign. I like knowing what’s going on, not having to guess all the time. But maybe that’s just me. Maybe others like mystery in their friends.

Regardless, I’m going to find some guy friends to hang out with, to talk about serious subjects with (once we get past the boring car talk), and to trade musical tastes with. We might even bake together sometime. Maybe then people will stop judging me for my female friends. I shouldn’t even care, but I do. I’m only human, after all. But for now I’ll keep up the search to find these diamonds in the rough — males who have layers. It might even be fun.

Sam