The Friend Cycle

Some friends are what I call for-the-moment friends, and I don’t mean the kind that ditch you when the going gets rough and you really need them to lean on. I mean those friends who come into your life unexpectedly and leave just as unexpectedly. Yet, after they’re gone you realize they were just what you needed for the time period. Either you were going through something difficult and they could relate, they were a shoulder to cry on when other friends were not around, or they carried you when you couldn’t carry yourself.

They’re kind of like superheroes, with their amazing powers, who help mere mortals from time to time, then retire to other places once you are safe. They’re Superman and you’re Lois Lane, a damsel in distress. And sometimes you’re that Superman, there for others when they need you, but only until they’re well again. Then you move on to the next person who needs you.

This happened to me recently when I was in need of advice and support. Out of nowhere, a marginal friend from Facebook messaged me out of the blue just to say hi, and I took it as a sign. Unburdened myself and immediately felt better. We had a nice long chat and I haven’t heard from him since. But that’s okay because he was there for that period of time when I needed him.

Then I suddenly got the chance to pay that forward when I got the inclination to message someone I felt was hurting. We hadn’t ever really talked before, but I felt led to speak to her. Before I knew it, she was letting it all go, and I just listened. I was that help she needed right then, and I know if she needs me again I will be there for her. But for one night, I was Superman, just like my other friend had been for me. And it feels good both ways.

I honestly believe that god drops people into our lives at strategic points when we desperately need them, and then sends them to others. These for-the-moment friends are amazing angels, and its amazing when we’re given wings too from time to time.

Sam

The Friendship Archive