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New York to California

“No mountain’s too high. No stone is too small. I’ll build a bridge through the fire. For you I would crawl from New York to California.” -Mat Kearney Have you ever felt this way about another person? I know, it’s easy to say you have, but did you ever take the time to truly consider … Continue reading New York to California

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Freewrite #8

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Now? Now? How about now?

I’ll tell you a secret. Now, you can’t tell a living soul because I would be absolutely mortified if anyone ever found this out about me. Okay, good. Here it is. Sometimes I’m awkward. You know, socially. Sometimes I walk into a room and see three separate groups sitting in three separate areas. So I sit all the way on the other side of the room by myself, hoping one of the three groups reaches out to me and makes me feel warm and safe in their cocoon. Otherwise, I bury my head in the book I always have along so I don’t seem like a pathetic idiot (um, yeah) and count the minutes until I can get back up and exit the room. Usually, though, one of the groups reels me in and I feel loved. Yeah, that’s all it takes.

It’s not like I don’t feel comfortable in social situations. For the most part I do, but there’s this in-between area when I’m uncertain of what’s expected of me, times when I feel like Sheldon Cooper and I have no idea what others are trying to say or do, or what they want from ME. And I hate that, that uncertainty. I deal in absolutes so much of the time that when there’s ambiguity I freeze up. Why do I do that? I’m sure others are judging me too when I do this, shaking their heads and whispering about me behind my back. “Why can’t he just understand?” “What’s up with him?” “He seemed pretty cool before.”

Then I start thinking about this mysterious “before.” When was I actually cool? Continue reading “Freewrite #8”

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First Love

You know, I almost married the girl. It was a whirlwind romance, born in summer, gestated in fall, and tested in a harsh winter, followed by an even harsher spring. We met, we wooed, we made exchange of vows (of the future marriage kind, not of the marriage itself kind), and I even spent the … Continue reading First Love

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I Remember

I remember… Phillies’ games on school afternoons the smell of popcorn at my first movie a time when tapes were king long walks up and down South Street paddle boating in Baltimore asking Kareema Perkins to go steady wishing for rain in summer dreaming of sheep in order to sleep blushing but no one noticing … Continue reading I Remember

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Checked Out: Week 1

Yes, I checked these out.

Okay, so admittedly I’m a book addict. I can’t help it. About this time last year I decided I was going to stop frequenting the library, that the number of books we own that I hadn’t read had gotten so huge that I would instead focus on them.

Two weeks later I was back at the library checking out an armload of books and breathing a huge sigh of relief. I know there are worse things to be addicted to (a lot worse), but I think I know now how crack addicts feel when they’re going through withdrawal. It wasn’t even like the books here at the house aren’t adequate, either. It’s just that I *knew* there were so many more out there, and I had to get my hands on them.

So, this year I’m not even pretending to be a good boy and read just the books here. Sure, I will sprinkle them in here and there, but I’m not going through that whole thing again. In fact, I’ve decided to use some space here to tell you about the books I currently have out from the library each week (they honestly do change from week to week). Maybe you’ll even want to read some of them, and perhaps I won’t even end up reading all of them myself, but at least for right now they’re in the queue, and sitting snugly on the bookshelf in my corner of the living room.

Here’s what I’ve Checked Out this week:

1. Innocence, by Dean Koontz

So, one of my favorite authors writes a book and I immediately seek out libraries hoping to get my grubby hands on it. Sound familiar? Oh, and did I mention that it’s our book club‘s book of the month for January, too? It means even if it wasn’t something I wanted to enjoy myself, now I have to get it done too. Continue reading “Checked Out: Week 1”

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Words

Words can get us into some serious trouble, can’t they? Have you ever been in a situation where a misunderstanding involving the words you used (or didn’t use) caused a major rift between you and someone else? And all you wanted to do was SCREAM what you were really trying to say, but they weren’t … Continue reading Words