I honestly cannot recall the last time I swore out loud. And I don’t recognize “damn” as a swear word because NBC doesn’t. That’s my guide. When I’m at home, usually the little ones are too, so I am permanently self-censored then, even when I hit my thumb hard with a hammer by accident. I swear up a storm in my head then, and some other choice times too, but somehow I don’t let the words escape my lips. When I’m at work I also censor myself because I never know who might be listening and making judgements based on what they hear out of my mouth. The same is true for being out in public in most situations for the same reason. I realize that others have made no such pact, because the sheer amount of cuss words I hear daily is astounding, and in the worst possible situations, in my opinion.
Case #1: A woman and her possibly three-year old son are walking down the street. She is on her cell phone swearing like a sailor as he listens intently.
Case #2: Several teenagers are hanging out in a department store near the escalators. One of them is regaling his friends with tales of his exploits the night before, peppering his language with expletives (rather loudly, too) while his friends laugh and swear along. Also while several parents and their children walk past quickly.
Case #3: The TV is on HBO, where cursing is prevalent for much of the night. A mother is using it as a babysitter for her kids while she plays Bejewelled on her phone, not even knowing that the TV is tuned to this channel, or knowing why it shouldn’t be. The kids, ranging in age from four to eight sit entranced, absorbing every second of it.
What is the problem with these scenarios? Well, simply put, people don’t seem to have that filter I am somehow able to find. And, believe me, I’m not saying I’m some saint, far from it. I just recognize that kids are going to hear enough of that stuff anyway, why should they have to hear it from me too? It seems like too many parents use it as an excuse for continuing to swear around their children instead.
You see, there is something about curse words that gets down deep and lodges itself in your soul, especially when you’re young and impressionable. It’s like an addiction, like smoking, like drinking too much, like gambling, like too fast driving, it becomes a part of you, for better or for worse, and usually for worse. That’s because it always seems the easiest for young minds to absorb the negatives, and hardest to keep a grasp on the positives. Have you ever noticed that no matter how many times you’ve held yourself in check and said the right thing, the one time you slipped and swore, that’s the one the kid keeps repeating at day care, at school, and at her play dates. Then, just let the judgements fly, because while those parents who swear in front of their kids all the time don’t even notice it, they definitely judge you harshly in return. Ironic how they can see you “clearly,” but not their kids. You can see it in their looks, but they never say a word to your face.
And remember, those people don’t matter. You have the biggest impact on your children, so whatever you’ve decided when it comes to swearing in your household, make sure your children understand the implications and impact if they do so, that they’re representing you and their entire family in public. You never know how important that can be, if you have that discussion with your kids, and you never know how that can affect their lives in the future either.
Now let me put on my headphones, so I can listen to this Snoop Dogg song.
Sam
Sam's Online Journal 