Odds are, if you’re over the age of 30, you probably have a set group of friends you’ve had for a while. They’re round about your age, give or take a couple of years. They probably either went to school with you or work(ed) with you at some point. And they almost
definitely are the same gender as you are. They share a lot of your views, but not all of them (friends don’t let friends vote for Pat Buchanan), which is okay. They’ve been to your house more than a couple of times, and you were the one who named their dog. By now you’re wondering how I got to be so clairvoyant, and what kind of hidden cameras I’m using. But, seriously, it’s easy to classify because so many people fit the paradigm. But what if you don’t? How do you make friends now that you’re over the age of 30?
1) Common activities.
You’re at the driving range and the guy next to you is using brand new Nike balls, so you break his concentration to tell him the range has perfectly good used golf balls for cheap. He is grateful, and you play a round together after the range.
2) Friends-in-law.
Your girlfriend has girlfriends who have boyfriends. Get to know them. When the girls are having a girls’ night out, you can hang with the fellas, drink beer, and watch football. Just try not to talk about the ladies. I hear they don’t like that.
3) On-line dating sites.
No, seriously. Hear me out. On-line dating sites are like the old Fluff and Fold laundromats used to be: hangout central! And most dating sites aren’t just for dating anymore. They have a “just friends” tab you can click, and voila! You’re meeting people with similar interests who don’t live too far from you. Be careful, though. Some people lie on their profiles. I don’t know why they would, but some people do.
Doing these three things will certainly increase your prospects for finding friends to hang out with over the age of 30. Just be sure that when you’re on the on-line dating sites, you don’t mistakenly put that you’re “single,” and looking for “love.” That’s a real pain to clear up once you’ve met someone that way.
Sam
Sam, you have a subtle sense of humor. I liked this post. It really IS harder to make friends after college (in my case as I am only 24) or after a certain age.
You mentioned a collaboration. I may have something you would be interested in. Please send me your e-mail.
Thank you for what you said about my sense of humor. I appreciate it. Emailing you NOW. 🙂
Lovely. You are welcome!
Wait, you play golf? Is that the instant-sport-once-you-have-kids?
Hey, don’t knock golf. It takes a lot of brainpower.
I didn’t knock it, though. Just struck me as weird how everyone with kids suddenly gets into golf 😛
Just so you know, I started playing golf a year before my first kid, so there! 🙂
lol!
This is so interesting and something I’ve been talking to people about for the past week about friendships and whether or not friends really are “the family we make ourselves,” as I’ve read several times. All of those I’m talking with range from their 30’s to 50’s. Some have carried their friends from their youth but just as many have made new ones. I’d like to link this in when I write about it, may I? And while I’m asking, would you be willing to share any further thoughts about friendship?
Elizabeth. You may certainly link this in when you reference it, no problems! I was actually thinking about another post about friendship soon. Any particular subtopic you would like to read about?
Hi, Sam. That would be great. I’ll be back in touch soon.